I've met a ton of recent grads since moving to Rochester in 2010. More often than not, the conversations I've had with these new acquaintances start of with a question that's dreaded by many post grads: "so..... what do you do?"
I don't dread this question or judge the people who ask it. I completely understand that sometimes there are only so many things you can talk about with an acquaintance before things take a turn for the awkward. Being new to our jobs is a common bond between most post grads, so it's only natural that talk about them in social gatherings.
While I understand the time and place for filler questions like these, I just hate the way this one is phrased. What do you do? Well... I listen to a lot of music, teach piano for fun, enjoy trying out new restaurants, and love running outside when the temperatures warm enough.
But that's not the answer that society has prepped us for. "What do you do?" means, "what's your job?" While my job is definitely one thing I do over the course of the week, it's not all that I do, and doesn't define everything I am.
I've really tried to avoid asking this question lately, even in the most awkward of conservation lulls. Instead, I'll try ask a new acquaintance what brought them to Rochester. If they like their job, this gives them an in to talk about it. If they don't, they can direct the conservation towards other parts of their lives.
How do you feel about the "what do you do" question?
How Did You Get This Number
"How Did You Get This Number" By Sloane CrosleyI love Sloane Crosley. Her stories mimic my own life. Her books are collections of personal essays so my attention deprived self can get through them. And she also makes me miss New York like I never thought I would.
There are 3 reasons this book resonated so much with me.
The first is that Sloane told stories about being abroad, both alone and with friends. Last year I went to Turkey for a week by myself, and everyone told me I was crazy. My mother thought I was going to be kidnapped and raped. My friends were supportive but incredulous, often saying things like "You're my hero, I could never do that." And my roommates mother was convinced that it meant I was a terrorist.
Now, Sloane did not go to Turkey, she went to France, so maybe it is a little different, but I liked hearing about the faux pas she had and that travel is most entertaining when looking back on it.
The second is that Sloane devotes an entire chapter/essay to describing how out of place she feels when in the middle of nowhere Alaska. I, too, am a city girl through and through. Transplant a city girl into the Alaskan wilderness and there is no chance you won't have a good story.
The third and final reason this book will be a favorite forever, is that the last chapter almost perfectly explained how I felt during my last romantic ending. I know that sounds very mushy and hormone driven, but for some reason it makes me feel better to know someone else has experienced what I did. And had pretty much the same reactions.
Rating: 4.2/5 stars
Fashion Investments
I wrote a post about fashion investment pieces a few weeks ago on my other blog (yes, I have two, I'm crazy) and thought it was an issue that would pertain to many post grad fashion lovers as well. Check it out below!
I read a ton of fashion blogs. I admire all of the photography and editing that goes into the posts, and find that many of the girls have genuinely sweet and relatable writing styles. And of course, there's the fashion. Mixing patterns, neutrals with pops of color, color blocking, belting, belting, belting! These are all trends that I've picked up on from reading blogs. I get behind these trends for the most part because they can be achieved on most budgets, but I'm still wary of one common phrase that seems to dominate the fashion world: "investment piece".
As a 23 year old girl making a modest salary, I can't imagine spending money on what many fashionistas would consider "investment pieces" at this point in my life. This doesn't mean I like to run around town in mismatched outfits. It just means that that I always take cost into serious consideration when making clothing purchases.
Take one of the most classically described "investment pieces": the pencil skirt. I see many girls that rationalize the purchase of pencil skirts as investment pieces. It's okay to drop over a hundred dollars on one piece of clothing because it will be worn forever....right?
If you've made room in your budget for this piece and know that you will be able to put away the same amount of money for savings, rent, food, student loans as you normally do monthly, then yes, I think it's totally fine to treat yourself to a versatile piece. But if you are already swimming in debt, paying bills month to month, and have parents that are still helping you with car payments and phone bills, I think it would be better to look for a piece that's equally versatile, but at a lower price point.
I know, I know. The quality just isn't the same! You will love the Jcrew skirt forever! But the truth of the matter is that we change sizes and change styles over time. We also live in a consumer culture that likes new things.
Once again, if you have the monetary means and budget to buy these pieces, go for it! If you have a smaller wardrobe made up of more expensive pieces that you budget for, that's fine. I think it's just important that we don't kid ourselves about our financial standing when it comes to fashion, especially those of us who are just starting out in the working world. The idea that this one extra piece of clothing will complete my closet just doesn't seem like a healthy way to view the role fashion should play in our lives. I think that our personal style should be used as a way to compliment who are as individuals, not complete us.
Instead of a "sky's the limit" attitude for an investment pieces like pencil skirts or black dresses, I would suggest setting a strict budget. Consider shopping at stores that fall a price point below the skirt you've been lusting after. Or even try thrift stores, consignment shops, or Ebay to see if you can snag a used version of the pricey skirt.
Will a less expensive or used skirt still be in great condition 10 years from now? Probably not. But I'm willing to bet that the item you blew your rent or student loan payment on will be shoved somewhere in the back of the closet, and you'll be on the hunt for new pieces that fit your 10 years from now lifestyle.
Alright, I'm stepping off my soapbox for now. I may not be a huge fan of the whole "investment" piece idea, but are you? Have you ever completely splurged on an item of clothing that was worth it? Tell me your stories!
I read a ton of fashion blogs. I admire all of the photography and editing that goes into the posts, and find that many of the girls have genuinely sweet and relatable writing styles. And of course, there's the fashion. Mixing patterns, neutrals with pops of color, color blocking, belting, belting, belting! These are all trends that I've picked up on from reading blogs. I get behind these trends for the most part because they can be achieved on most budgets, but I'm still wary of one common phrase that seems to dominate the fashion world: "investment piece".
As a 23 year old girl making a modest salary, I can't imagine spending money on what many fashionistas would consider "investment pieces" at this point in my life. This doesn't mean I like to run around town in mismatched outfits. It just means that that I always take cost into serious consideration when making clothing purchases.
Take one of the most classically described "investment pieces": the pencil skirt. I see many girls that rationalize the purchase of pencil skirts as investment pieces. It's okay to drop over a hundred dollars on one piece of clothing because it will be worn forever....right?
If you've made room in your budget for this piece and know that you will be able to put away the same amount of money for savings, rent, food, student loans as you normally do monthly, then yes, I think it's totally fine to treat yourself to a versatile piece. But if you are already swimming in debt, paying bills month to month, and have parents that are still helping you with car payments and phone bills, I think it would be better to look for a piece that's equally versatile, but at a lower price point.
I know, I know. The quality just isn't the same! You will love the Jcrew skirt forever! But the truth of the matter is that we change sizes and change styles over time. We also live in a consumer culture that likes new things.
Once again, if you have the monetary means and budget to buy these pieces, go for it! If you have a smaller wardrobe made up of more expensive pieces that you budget for, that's fine. I think it's just important that we don't kid ourselves about our financial standing when it comes to fashion, especially those of us who are just starting out in the working world. The idea that this one extra piece of clothing will complete my closet just doesn't seem like a healthy way to view the role fashion should play in our lives. I think that our personal style should be used as a way to compliment who are as individuals, not complete us.
Instead of a "sky's the limit" attitude for an investment pieces like pencil skirts or black dresses, I would suggest setting a strict budget. Consider shopping at stores that fall a price point below the skirt you've been lusting after. Or even try thrift stores, consignment shops, or Ebay to see if you can snag a used version of the pricey skirt.
Will a less expensive or used skirt still be in great condition 10 years from now? Probably not. But I'm willing to bet that the item you blew your rent or student loan payment on will be shoved somewhere in the back of the closet, and you'll be on the hunt for new pieces that fit your 10 years from now lifestyle.
Alright, I'm stepping off my soapbox for now. I may not be a huge fan of the whole "investment" piece idea, but are you? Have you ever completely splurged on an item of clothing that was worth it? Tell me your stories!
Charity
One of my goals for 2012 was to give to charity at least once a month. Whether it be in the form of money, time, old clothes, or a walk, I need to be doing something for others. At my job I am often catering to the wealthy, or Corporate America. Both of which I have come to despise. It also causes me to put wealth in perspective.
I've talked about Charity walks before, I love doing them. But it is not the season to walk outside right now. Until it gets warm again I need to give back a different way. There are many in this world far worse off than us Post Grads. Those who did not have the opportunity to go to college, or even finish a basic education. We complain about doing laundry while others can't afford clothes. We eat less to fit into a dress while others scrounge for food.
One of my go-to charities is St. Jude's Children's Research Hospital. I try to give to them at least twice a year. This type of donation is pretty cut-and dry, though. You choose how much to give, and they send you a receipt. Nothing very personalized about it.
One of the newer places I found was thanks to Erin at Analyfe. It is called Kiva. It is a microlending non-profit that assists people around the world in their efforts to get out of poverty. You can read about the potential borrowers and the endeavors they are working on in their countries. You can also read about their repayment history. When was the last time you lent someone $25, knew you'd get it back, and also knew they would be using it for good? This is what Kiva does.
Other charitable things I am looking into is Habitat for Humanity. I have wanted to volunteer for them for a long time. The issue is that there are very little builds going on in my area. Instead they have a store, called ReStore, that has building materials and home improvement supplies for 50-90% retail value. They ask for volunteers to run the store, take stock of the donations, etc. I may need to do this if a build opportunity does not come up soon.
How do you all give back to the community around you? Are there any really great things I am missing?
The World of Smart Phones
Despite the fact that my job requires me to be up to date on the latest online marketing and social media techniques, I am verrrrry slow when it comes to adopting the latest and greatest technology gadgets. I have a 4 year old dell computer that is anything but glamorous, but perfect for getting the basics done. I own an iPad only because my boss gave them out to my company as a Christmas gift last year. Otherwise, I would have never made the plunge to own a tablet. For years I never upgraded my flip cell phone because I just didn't see the point. I'm cheap when it comes to technology, so this weekend I did something very out of the ordinary: I bought an iPhone 4s.
Once again, I wouldn't have done this if I didn't get a great deal on the whole purchase. Since I'm on my family's plan still, it only cost an extra 30 dollars per month to add a Verizon data plan phone to our family package (much better than the 115 a month it would cost me to have the same amount of data and be on my own plan.)
I also got the phone at a discounted price since I ordered it through Best Buy. I highly suggest doing this if you're considering upgrading your phone! Best Buy stores are now compatible with most cell phone providers, and they really don't push the hard sell on you like I've felt in the past at Verizon stores.
Here are some observations from my first week as an Iphone user
1. I keep forgetting that it's an actual phone since it looks like a mini iPad. Every time it rings or I get a text I'm surprised.
2. Connectivity is addicting.
3. I enjoy having a robotic assistant. I thought I wouldn't ever use the Siri iPhone 4s feature, but I use it all the time!
4. I've been taking way more photos than usual. This is actually one of the major reasons why I wanted to update to a smart phone. The camera on the iPhone is the same quality as many point and shoot cameras I've had in the past, and its much easier to lug around than my very nice, but very large, Cannon DSLR.
5. I've been tweeting more. Once again... connectivity is addicting!
Post Grads Hate: Laundry
I have never been a fan of doing laundry. I actually own enough pairs of underwear to last me about 2 months so that I can go as long as possible without doing laundry. And that is just the clothes aspect of laundry. I have 2 distinct sets of sheets and comforters too, again to avoid doing laundry.
Reasons doing laundry is the bane of my existence:
- The laundry room is usually located in the basement. In order to get the dirty laundry to the washing machine it literally needs to go past other tenants in the building. It needs to be drug, lugged and carried while you hope no one needs to get past you on the stairwell.
- Most of the laundry machines only take quarters. And a lot of them. I don't know about you but I don't usually have $5 in quarters lying around.
- I've noticed there are usually 2 washers and dryers per building. These are
supposed to accommodate anywhere from 6 to 25 apartments that each house at least 2 people. By my calculations that means you will always be either fighting for a machine or waiting impatiently for one to free up. - The dryer never actually dries your stuff. Ever. Every time I do laundry I have to hang about half the load around my room to finish drying.
- Laundry isn't done after the clothes are dry. You still have to fold them, or hang them, or put them away in some sense.
Considering all of this, I avoid doing laundry like it's my job. My next apartment needs to have a washer and dryer unit in it so that maybe I can remedy this. It's one on a long list of requirements for my next apartment. This is also why I will not being doing laundry today.
Have a happy Sunday Post Grads!
One Step Behind
It's been tough getting back into the swing of things after spending a week at home for the holidays. I feel like I'm not managing my time well, and my life as a whole just feels a bit unorganized. I'm trying to make some positive changes in my life. I recently took on another piano student, and I just started my first book of 2012, The Happiness Project, by Gretchen Rubin. I'm also trying to keep up a normal workout schedule and eat right to keep up with my 2012 resolution.
Even with all of these positive things, I still feel behind when it comes to daily activities. Every time I leave the house with hair that's still damp from the shower, I think about how I need to start waking up earlier. Every time I throw on a boring but safe combination of work clothes I think about how I should lay them out the night before. Every time I load groceries into my car and notice all of the random crap in my backseat, I think about how I'll vacuum and clean it out in the next few days. All of these things are such simple tasks, but I
can never bring myself to do them when the time comes. They never happen.
One blog that has been helping me shake this winter slump is called Smart Pretty and Awkward. It's geared towards women and I love reading the short advice in each daily post. The advice isn't preachy at all, just simple tips from the author on self improvement.
Do you ever have days (or weeks.. or months...) where you just feel a step behind everyone else? How do you get out of the funk?
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